At thanksgiving we have a tradition of going around the table before we eat and having each person say what they are thankful for during the year. When you have little children you never know what they will say, so it can be a fun tradition.
Sometimes if you're in the middle of a divorce or you just got through a divorce it is hard to come up with something for which to be thankful. It is easy to allow all the bad things happening to overshadow the good in your life. Thanksgiving affords us the opportunity to look at what we have rather than obsessing over what we do not have. As a single parent you have a chance to demonstrate thankfulness to your children. Children learn most by our example so take advantage of this opportunity.
Some of you will not have your children with you during this holiday. Your child will be sitting at the table of their other parent. This can make the holidays feel especially lonely and difficult. You cannot allow yourself to show your sadness to your children that they'll be someplace else during this holiday. Send them off with a smile and a hug being thankful that your children are happy and healthy and have two parents to love them. If you're alone during the holiday, find something useful to do with your time. Go down to the soup kitchen and serve those who truly have nothing.
For some of you, your children will be with you during the holiday. It might be the first holiday without their other parent being present. You might see the empty seat at the table and feel a sense of loss. The thing to remember is that you and your children are a family in your own right. Just because mom or dad is not sitting at the table doesn't mean you're not a whole family. If you had old traditions that involved both parents, create new ones to replace them. Shake things up, be different. Try going out for Thanksgiving instead of cooking this year, there are many restaurants that fix fabulous thanksgiving dinners. Some churches also offer a thanksgiving dinner where you just bring one dish and they supply the turkey. Alternatively, invite other single parents to your place for Thanksgiving Dinner. Do something to shake it up and make it new, exciting and fun.
Most of all remember this season what you have, focus on the good, and you will get through it better than before.
Stephanie L Watson
BellaOnline's Divorce Editor
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art198...
Posted By: The SISTAHS Ministry
Wednesday, November 26th 2008 at 12:31PM
You can also
click
here to view all posts by this author...
