Are You Being Too Picky?
Kristina de la Cal
BellaOnline's Dating Editor
Everybody has their own set of expectations when it comes to dating and no matter how difficult it may be to reach those expectations, the last thing anyone should ever do is lower them. I am here to tell you that what you want in a mate does exist, you do deserve it, and when the time is right, it will be yours.
In today’s fast-paced world of modern conveniences and instant gratification, far too many people are settling for second rate relationships simply because they aren’t willing to wait for the right one or because they may not believe that they can do better. No matter how much history or love there may be between you and your partner, life is too short to be trapped in a dead-end relationship with someone that has proven to be unworthy of your affections.
There is nothing wrong with being choosy about whom you will or will not open up your heart to. Lowering your standards may improve your dating quantitatively but it will likely not be worth the sacrifice you’d have to make on the qualitative level. Ultimately, only you can decide if quality is more important to you than quantity.
If you have had limited success in the dating arena and are beginning to wonder if perhaps you are being too picky, then it may be the case that you are simply being too picky about the wrong things. Before lowering your standards, analyze your expectations to ensure that they are measuring the specific qualities that you are looking for in a mate. For instance, if the only thing you hope to gain out of your dating experiences is some arm candy, the physical appearance of your partner should be high on your priority checklist while shopping around for a new mate. On the other hand, if you are looking for something more meaningful than a pretty face to look at, it would make more sense to set expectations that focus more on character and personality than on appearances. Chemistry is of course a crucial aspect of dating but contrary to popular belief; physical appearances have surprisingly little to do with the chemistry levels that exist between two people. The more chemistry you have with someone, the more you will be attracted to that person regardless of what he/she may look like.
No matter what you are looking for in a mate, it is up to you to set the bar that potential suitors ought to reach in order to win your affections. Think about what qualities are most important to you in a partner and then set your expectations accordingly. The process may be a slow one but don’t forget that the best things in life are almost always well worth the wait so keep your expectations high and your hopes even higher.
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art262...
Posted By: The SISTAHS Ministry
Wednesday, December 24th 2008 at 1:46PM
You can also
click
here to view all posts by this author...
